...อาการเดิมเดิม...

posted on 13 Jun 2011 01:35 by mermate-m-mermate
:
เหงา….โว๊ยยยยยยยยยยยยย อาการแบบนี้ไม่ได้มาเพิ่งเป็น แต่มันจะมาเป็นระยะ ยิ่งเวลาที่เราเหนื่อย และอะไรหลายๆอย่างเข้ามาพร้อมกัน หยั่งกับพายุล่ะก็ น้ำตาแตกกันเลยที่เดียว แต่พอพรุ่งนี้เช้าทุกอย่างมันก็หายไปเหลือเพียงปมเล็กๆที่อยู่ในใจเรา และมันก็พร้อมจะเกิดขึ้นถ้าเราปล่อยใจไปกับมันT____T
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เราอยู่คนเดียวมาประมาณ 8 เดือนแระ จริงๆมันมากกว่านั้น เพียงแต่ว่าก่อนหน้านั้น เรายังมีเค้า))**แต่ตอนนี้ไม่มีแระ ฮ่าๆๆ ตลกกลบเกลื่อน//w--" พยายามหาไรทำ พยายามไม่คิดถึงเค้า แต่ไปที่ทำงาน ก็ต้องผ่านที่ทำงานเค้าประจำ

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ตื่นนอนหันไปก็เหมือนว่ามีเค้าอยู่เคียงข้าง รถน้ำต้นไม้ที่ไปซื้อด้วยกัน เข้าห้องน้ำก็เห็นฟองน้ำที่เค้าซื้อมาฝาก เปิดม่านไปก็เห็นภาพเค้ามารอรับเรา เลยทำให้เราไม่อยากอยู่หอเดิมเลย ไม่อยากจริงๆแต่ก็นั่นแระ!!!

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จริงๆเวลาเราฟังธรรมะ ท่านวอเทศน์ว่าทุกข์อยู่ที่ตัวเราทั้งนั้นแระ เราปล่อยใจ อนุญาติให้ภาพเก่าๆเข้ามาทำร้ายใจเราเอง  มันก็จริงอย่างที่ท่านเทศน์ แต่พอเราอยู่คนเดียวมันห้ามใจไม่อยู่นิหน่า O_o'เวลาคนเรามีความรักเราก็มักจะรักเค้าร้อยเต็ม ไม่ว่าจะได้กลับมาเท่าไหร่ก็ตาม เราผิดหรอที่เรารักใครสักคน แล้วรักเค้าจนหมดหัวใจของเรา โดนไม่แคร์ว่ามันจะกลับมาทำร้ายตัวเรา

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^^ผิดซิ^^………….ผิดที่เค้าไม่ได้รักเราไงเรารู้ทั้งรู้ มัวแต่หลอกตัวเอง ว่าเค้าจะกลับมา หลอกว่าเค้ายังอยู่ หลอกว่าทุกอย่างจะเป็นเหมือนเดิม มันไม่มีทางหรอก ไม่มีทางจริงๆๆ

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เพลง รักตัวเองให้เป็น... (หนึ่ง ณรงค์วิทย์)

เคยลองรักใครให้ใจวุ่นวาย

เอาตัวและใจให้ไปไม่ยั้ง
แต่ละคนก็ทำให้เจ็บซ้ำๆ ช้ำจนใจแทบพัง
หากว่าคุณก็เจอแต่คนที่ไม่จริงใจ

อยู่คนเดียวก็ดีเหมือนกันไม่เปลืองหัวใจ
อาจจะมีแค่เหงา เหงาบ่อยๆก็คุ้นกันไป
อยู่คนเดียวก็ดีเหมือนกันมันคงไม่ตาย
ช้ำมากไปก็พัก ไม่มีใครรักก็รักตัวเองให้เป็น

ไม่มีใครรัก ก็รักตัวเองให้เป็น

 ถึงเราจะทำร้ายจิตใจตัวเราเองเพราะยังคิดถึงเค้า แค่ไหนแต่เราจะไม่มีทางทำร้ายจิตใจคนอื่นเป็นแน่แท้**  เนินนานแค่ไหนว่าจะรักษาหัวใจที่บาดเจ็บได้   เพราะเราเข้าใจดีว่าการถูกทำร้ายจิตใจมันเป็นยังไง แต่เมื่อพายุผ่านคลื่นลม  ผ่านพ้นไป  เราสัญญาว่าเราจะไม่อ่อนแออีก …………….//แต่อ่อนไหวอ่ะไม่แน่ อุ๊กิ๊วววววววววT____TO_o 

 

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